I've done some major contemplating today about the current points of stress in my life. My job is actually the least of my worries, after all it does pay the bills.
I have come to understand that I do love being a medical technologist and I love what I do, but that I can't stand my employer and the underhanded way that they treat their employees. I have decided to try to look for another job in another department and ride out the last year of my signing contract with my employer in another department. I will try to network with some of the supervisors that had their eye on me when I was an intern. Some of them showed a lot of interest in me, and were it not for the lack of open positions at the time, they would have considered me for an open position in a heartbeat. If I cannot find another position in another department, I will just stay in the position that I am currently in and, assuming that I feel the same way in a year that I do now, I will leave my employer in one year to work for another organization.
I have learned a lot working in the chemistry and toxicology departments, so much more than before I was hired there. The experience has been priceless and I now have more of an understanding of chemistry and toxicology than I could have ever imagined. But I can only describe working in those departments as "toxic". The egos are as large as buildings, you are stabbed in the back at every turn, your generosity is taken advantage of, and all the while people are rewarded for mediocrity or just doing their jobs and others just get away with murder. Not to mention the equipment that we use is as old if not older than I am, and is breaking down left and right. They are too cheap to buy new analyzers and when they do decide to buy new ones they drag their feet, and when finally purchased they aren't the ones that are really needed or will be utilized by everyone.
Many people who have gotten out have told me to get out too. I ignored these people's negativity and dismissed the people who bitched and moaned to me since my first day about their jobs. My decision was entirely objective, only in hindsight do I really realize that they were right about most things. So trust me, I am not the only person that feels this way. Many others like me are making plans for an exit. The department is always hiring because people are always leaving for one reason or another. I want to get out because I believe that I can do better and find a position that allows me to utilize more of the skills and knowledge that I went to school for five years for. Since everything is so automated, I mostly utilize my knowledge to analyze patient results, for quality control, and technical issues. The analyzers do the most of the testing, very little is hands on. I know that that is the direction the laboratory is heading but I really do not want to lose the bulk of the knowledge that I have worked so hard and so long to achieve because I am not using it.
Going back to school for higher education is also an option, albeit not any time soon. After some consideration I am starting to become interested in becoming a pathologist. I know that that will be a lot more work (and money) but it also doesn't hurt to keep my options open. I'm going to see how things play out though, not only with my job but with Craig's as well. I'm not about to make a huge decision to go back to school and get myself deeper into debt, just to have him lose his job. I need to be ready to assume all of our bills should anything like that happen. God forbid.
This is my conclusion. I'm probably going to refer back to this entry to remind myself of my goals and the reasons behind my decisions.